California Gives Up on Law Enforcement

May 28th, 2008 Posted in Celebrities, Epic Fail, Scandal, The Bad

In a move that’s surprising to no one, the Judicial System in California phoned-in another case of a celebrity wiping their ass with the law. CSI Star Gary Dourdan was arrested some time ago (I’m too lazy to check back and see when) after he was found passed out in his car, which was facing the wrong direction on the road. In his possession police found: HEROIN, ECSTASY, and COCAINE. But guess what, Dourdan plead guilty to the counts of possessing cocaine and ecstasy, and the prosecution just pretended the heroin was just make believe. Unconfirmed reports also state the Dourdan cockslapped the judge for making him come to court for all this nonsense. When is an earthquake supposed to kick California out of the country again? People:

Gary Dourdan, best known for his role on CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, pleaded guilty to counts of cocaine and Ecstasy possession during his arraignment Wednesday in Indio, Calif.

He was charged with three counts of felony drug possession following his April 28 early-morning arrest in Palm Springs, Calif. The heroin count was dismissed.

“As a result of today’s proceedings, Gary has been given diversion (a drug treatment program),” his lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley said outside the Lawson Justice Center. “He very much regrets what happened and he’s very embarrassed by what occurred, but he’s looking forward to moving on and getting back to work.”

Dourdan had faced up to three years and eight months based on the charges filed against him. Instead, he faces no prison time, but must complete the 16-class drug program.

Seriously, what the hell? Does the actor’s union have something on the law enforcement in LA? Do they have photos of the chief banging a hooker on top of another dead hooker? What the hell excuse did they use for dropping the heroin charge? You realize what would happen if you or I (mostly you) got arrested with three felony drugs in our possession, while we were passed out in a car that we were presumably driving under the influence of THREE FUCKING DRUGS. Well I’ll tell you. We’d be sent to Myanmar to be apart of their brilliantly designed “Human Wall Against the Evil Typhoons.” And that shit is going to work too. You just send a Cat 5 Typhoon up against that wall Mother Nature, and see what happens…… Everyone in the wall will die and the Myanmar Military Junta is fucking retarded you say? Well then.

- Bluto -