Christina Applegate has Breast Cancer
August 4th, 2008 Posted in Celebrities, The Bad
Stupid cancer decided to invade Christina Applegate’s breasts over the past however long it takes for cancer to form. Luckily, the cancer was caught in its early stages and it not life-threatening. People reports:
Christina Applegate has been diagnosed with breast cancer, a rep for the 36-year-old Samantha Who? Emmy nominee announced late Saturday.
“Christina Applegate was diagnosed with an early form of breast cancer. Benefiting from early detection through a doctor ordered MRI, the cancer is not life threatening.”
The rep added: “Christina is following the recommended treatment of her doctors and will have a full recovery. No further statement will be issued at this time.”
Ya know what cancer, I’m getting pretty sick of you attacking our Holy Orbs of Saintly Glory. You want to take our lungs? Fine. Colon? Sure, why not. Brain? We don’t need that anyway. But I’ll be damned if I’m just going to sit here and let you fuck with those bountiful beauties of bouncing boobies. Alright then, someone tell our intern Bill to stop playing in Harold the Great White Shark’s mouth and pack my Israeli Assassin Playtime Kit.
- Bluto -
Tags: Breast Cancer, Christina Applegate