Holly Madison is a Bitch…. With Large Boobs

Bananaphone Express was in Duress.

June 17th, 2008 Posted in Celebrities, Scandal

Apparently, the ultra-sexy, nude pillow fights of my dreams do not take place at the Male Holy Grail Playboy Mansion between the three ladies of the Girls Next Door as I envisioned, and detailedly drew up in blueprint. Why the hell did I even buy the sketching pencils and architect paper? According to this story posted on TMZ, Holly Madison is a major bitch who everyone hates, especially fellow Hugh Hefner penis hat, Kendra Wilkinson:

TMZ spies tell us Hef’s number one Bunny Holly Madison is ruling the Mansion with an iron fist … causing major drama with the staff and on the set of “The Girls Next Door.” We’re told everyone “hates” Holly, but no one more than Kendra Wilkinson, Hef’s other Bunny-in-Waiting.

It’s gotten so bad, those two can’t be in a room for more than five minutes without totally going at it. And that’s posing major problems for producers of the show who have to shoot around the flying fur. As for Bridget, she’s Switzerland, often trying, but failing, to keep the peace.

Our spies also say Holly’s ambition is spilling over to the magazine too. She wants to have editorial control over the mag’s spreads — which is not going over well with longtime employees.

For their part, “Girls” producers tell us they’re “not aware” of any rift between the ladies — affecting the show or life at the Mansion.

Originally, I thought this was a travesty as we may no longer see these three prancing around together in nothing but, well nothing, but my recent thought activity has lead me to believe that if this bickering continues, we may be witness to some of the sexiest catfights known to man. And since these KY Jelly-infused matches would take place in the Playboy Mansion, it would be only a matter of time before they nakedly wrestle each other into a pool of chocolate pudding, which they would then have to lick off each other because, god-willing, the showers are broken. Hugh Hefner you magnificient bastard, you’ve done it again.

- Bluto -