Jessica Simpson Fondles Herself
May 21st, 2008 Posted in Celebrities, The Good
Here are some craptacular pictures of Jessica Simpson doing what every man on the planet has wanted to do for the past five years. These are also some pictures of the biggest asshole in the world. Who is this asshole you ask? That towel. Who does this son of a bitch think he is? I’m 700% certain that it is bolded, underlined, and italicized in the Constitution that he is obligated to do his duty and fall the fuck off when he is covering Jessica Simpson Naked Boobs. This is why we must destroy all towels within a 10,000 mile radius. Somebody get the South Park military on the case.
Also,
Let me be the first to introduce the fun, family-friendly, “Where’d Waldo: Joe Simpson Edition.” If Jessica Simpson’s awesome rack is this close to freedom you know Joe Simpson is somewhere hiding in the bushes with his pants unzipped.
Also, I think that more hot women with super awesome boobs should follow Jessica Simpson’s precedent and do public breast examinations. You know what happens then? No more wars. So stop being warmongers goddammit.
Photo: Egotastic
- Bluto -
Tags: Bikini, Breast Exam, Jessica Simpson, Topless
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